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verbal abuse... i cant take it anymore

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1 verbal abuse... i cant take it anymore on Wed Jul 01, 2015 7:35 am

Aye de Jesus


Arresto Menor
Hi,

I need help. May partner po ako, a lesbian. We've been together for almost 6 years. She was very manipulative ever since. Ayaw nya po ako lumalabas with friends lali na kapag may lalaki. Palagi nya po sinasabi saken na babastisin lang ako lalo na kapag lasing na. Supervisor po ako sa isang call center, and normal lang po na may team building, pero kapag nagpaplano na po ako sa team ko, hindi natutuloy dahil hindi po sya kasama, at baka mabastos daw po ako. Umabot na din po sa point na hindi na ako lumalabas kasama ang kahit sino, wala na din po akong kaibigan sa office namen.

Recently, nagkaron ng involve na 3rd party, isang lesbian din na naging kaClose ko. Aminado po ako, mali ko na nagkaron ng emotional involvement. Funny at it may say, almost all conversation namin, sa email lang po talaga. Nagsimula po lahat sa pakikipagkaibigan, na di ko naman po minasama hangganf sa nahuli nya kami, pinahiya ako ng partner ko sa harap nung isang lesbian at umabot po sa point na pinagbabantaan akong ipahiya sa trabaho... Gumawa po ako ng secret email para lang makapagSorry dun sa tao, hanggang sa nagtuloy tuloy po usapan namen, kumbaga, nakahanap po ako ng kakampi or kaibigan sa email lang... nahuli na naman po ako ng kinakasama ko... sa sobrang takot ko po na ipahiya ako sa office, nagset ako ng meeting sa aming tatlo (ako, ang partner ko and yung lesbian na involve) sa isang hotel sa makati. sa loob po ng hotel, nakita po nung isang lesbian kung paano ako pagbuhatan ng kamay, sigawan, ipahiya ant sabihan ng kung anu anong salita.

isang buwan na po mula nung mangyari yung incident sa hotel, hindi na din po kami naguusap or nagkikita nung lesbian na involve. ngayon po, pati trabaho ko, apektado na... pinopilit ko po umuwi ng maaga para lang di maabutan yung isang lesbian. pinagbabantaan pa din po ako ng partner ko ng kung ano ano. na ipapahiya daw ako sa trabaho, minsan, sasabihin nyang ang sarap kong patayin. masyado po nya akong ini-interogate to the point na hindi na po ako nakakain at nakakatulog ng maayos. wala po akong pamilyang pwedeng sumbungan dahil tinakwil na po nila ako. minsan ko na po syang sinabihan na sobra na sya pero binabalik lang po nya ang kasalanan ko. sinubukan ko na pong makipaghiwalay pero, pinagbabantaan pa din po ako. napipilitan nalang po akong sabihin na mahal ko sya para lang matapos ang gulo. madalas po nyang sabihin sakin na makapal ang mukha ko, na malandi ako at kahit sino pwede kong patulan. kahit po mga ahente ko, lalo na kapag tomboy, punagiisipan nyang di maganda. ying cellphone and emails ko po, kontrolado nya. hindi ko na po alam ang gagawin ko. natatakot po akong mawalan ng trabaho dahil dito. hindi ko na po gusto ang nangyayari...

sana po may tumulong. salamat po.

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2 Re: verbal abuse... i cant take it anymore on Wed Jul 01, 2015 12:59 pm

Katrina288


Reclusion Perpetua
Hi,

If you fear for your safety and welfare, you might as well get out of that relationship. However, at the end of the day, it is you who will decide whether or not you should leave her or stay with her. If you choose to stay with her, I strongly advise that you should both look for a relationship counsellor to resolve the issues that you yourselves cannot resolve on your own.

A relationship that has no absolute trust for each other will not produce favourable outcome.

If, however, you decided to end the relationship and want to take legal action, you can file a criminal complaint against her for violation of RA 9262 (Anti Violence Against Women and Their Children). If she is found guilty by the court, the penalty is imprisonment.

In the meantime, you may obtain a protection order from the barangay or from the court. A protection order will prohibit her from getting physically near you.

Regards,
Atty. Katrina

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3 Re: verbal abuse... i cant take it anymore on Thu Jul 02, 2015 5:29 am

Aye de Jesus


Arresto Menor
thank you atty katrina.

question po... yung protection order po ba, is it only applicable na hindi sya physically makalapit? kasi po, nagbabanta din pi sya na sisirain nya ko in any form sa office, like email my bosses and etc... same office lang po kasi kami...

and do I need to present evidences of his actions... I really want to get out of this relationship... I am just too afraid to fight...

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4 Re: verbal abuse... i cant take it anymore on Fri Jul 03, 2015 9:27 am

Katrina288


Reclusion Perpetua
Yes, the protection order is for her to refrain from getting physically close to you. Are you still living together?

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5 Re: verbal abuse... i cant take it anymore on Fri Jul 03, 2015 5:14 pm

Aye de Jesus


Arresto Menor
Yes we are still living together. I am still thinking of ways on how can I pursue what I want to happen. All my messages (emails/texts) are being monitored. Even my social medias and all. Even at the office, I am being monitored. I no longer goes out with other people because he keeps on thinking that I will meet up with whoever.

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6 Re: verbal abuse... i cant take it anymore on Fri Jul 03, 2015 5:18 pm

raheemerick


Reclusion Perpetua
you will lose half of your life pag hinayaan mo manatili ka sa kanya.

your just wasting your time and your life.

goodluck:)

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7 Re: verbal abuse... i cant take it anymore on Fri Jul 03, 2015 7:00 pm

Katrina288


Reclusion Perpetua
My suggestion is get out of that relationship. Go to your parents' house or friend's house temporarily then immediately apply for a protection order and file a case for violation of RA 9262. Seek the assistance of the police, etc.

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