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child custody of an unmarried mother

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1 child custody of an unmarried mother on Fri Jan 14, 2011 7:05 pm

distressed


Arresto Menor
hi attorney,

im a mother to a 6-yr old daughter, who's turning 7 this year. i had her when i was 17 and gave birth to her by 18. i've had a complicated life ever since due to my own parents' separation and many other family related problems which made me decide to seek for her father's family's help starting when she was around 2 or 3 years of age. ever since last year, i've been trying to regain ground with my daughter, though i've always had this bad feeling in my gut that they just wont let me (i.e; making excuses to not let me get her for the weekends due to whatever reasons). by the way, im not married to the guy, so i would like to know based on Philippine Law, what my rights are for my daughter and up to what extent (support from the father, full custody, etc). i've been playing on the thoughts of getting her back for good since the mind games they have been putting me on is just too exhausting for me already. i also have started a family of my own now and want my daughter to be part of that, together with her 2 younger siblings. can you kindly shed some light on this matter? as i wouldn't want to act out of impulse without having some educated advise on this issue.

thanks!

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2 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Sat Jan 15, 2011 2:01 pm

attyLLL


moderator
i presume you are not married to the father. the mother of an illegitimate child has sole parental authority and that cannot be lost unless it is declared by the court. they will surely try to argue that you abandoned your child.

as a first step go to dswd with the child's birth certificate and file a complaint to get your child. since she is less than 7, the dswd may conduct a rescue operation.

if legal action is necessary, then the proper recourse is to file a petition for habeas corpus and custody of minor.


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3 Hi attorney on Wed Feb 02, 2011 6:11 am

leslie anne batara


Arresto Menor
Please do help me..

My name is Leslie and I am 20 years old ..
I have my son taken away from me by his own father. He is borrowing my son at first,but then, after that some time in October last year , he doesn't want to give my child back. He said that he already filed a custody case for my son and i can claim mine as a counter affidavit but I haven't received any letter from the court or whatsoever they are talking about. My son is only 11 months. They didn't let me see my son last Christmas and new year. They said that I was doing immoral thing such as I now have a boyfriend. We are not married and if that is the case, I can prove that he cheated me before when I was pregnant and living in his own house but he brought his OTHER girl there ,see me face to face and his mother, being a "konsintedora" let him and the girl sleep in one room.(take note) They did that knowing that I can always come by and see them. Anyways, all I want now is my child. How can I get my son back and what charges can I file against him and his family for taking away my child. Thank You !! Hope you can help me as soon as possible before my child's first bday... Crying or Very sad

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4 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Wed Feb 02, 2011 9:40 am

Hija just back read the post of AttyLLL.

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5 ^^ on Wed Feb 02, 2011 9:45 am

leslie anne batara


Arresto Menor
sorry ... ^^

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6 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Wed Feb 02, 2011 5:44 pm

attyLLL


moderator
leslie, i'd go first to the dswd for help where the child lives. if that doesn't work out, the women's desk of the police station.


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7 thanks on Fri Feb 04, 2011 6:39 am

leslie anne batara


Arresto Menor
yes I went there yesterday and got interviewed by a social worker .. said that they will go to the my ex's house and check them over .. Just for a backup plan .. I went to their baranggay also and request for a blotter . They said that they will have them meet me there,the conversation will only take place on the office only for my security,if in 3 hearings and they will not show up, The police will escort me to get my son.. They are insulting baranggay counselors for they said that those men have no idea about the law. They are so boastful!(the family of my ex) .. Have I done the right thing?

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8 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Fri Feb 04, 2011 7:01 pm

attyLLL


moderator
They said that they will have them meet me there,the conversation will only take place on the office only for my security,if in 3 hearings and they will not show up, The police will escort me to get my son.

who said this, dswd or bgy? i'd prefer the dswd because they really have legal authority to get the child, but not the bgy.


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9 hi on Sat Feb 05, 2011 7:37 am

leslie anne batara


Arresto Menor
the brgy said that but i followed it up with them and said that it is best to go to dswd.i called dswd and they gave me their extension number but no one is anwering.. seems like it will take a long time for me to get my child . last time i went there it took a month for the action. Hope i can get my son before his first bday this coming march 23. Sad

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10 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Sat Feb 05, 2011 9:17 am

attyLLL


moderator
give them time to verify your claims. what do you mean 'last time you went there'. did you already complain this to them before?


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11 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Sat Feb 05, 2011 1:38 pm

leslie anne batara


Arresto Menor
Yes , when I was about to go home and i want to take my son with me because I want to end the relationship between me and the father. After 3 days and when the family of my child found out that I went there, they automatically surrendered my child. After a month, DSWD went to their house for my previous complain. I dont know why they didn't continue to do actions .Maybe because they found out that the arrangement between me and the father is okay . AT FIRST. But after that they didn't want to give my son back. I was thinking of asking for some help with the TULFOs for faster actions..What do you think ? Is it okay or will it make things more complicated?

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12 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Sat Feb 05, 2011 1:43 pm

leslie anne batara


Arresto Menor
If ever i get my son .Can i demand that he cannot borrow my son but he can visit him twice a week and I should be the one who has to buy all of my son's needs. Because back then. when I was still living with him , Even though he is the one working for his family , He is not giving any cent for me to buy my child's diapers and milk.Even in my child's checkup my ex's mother is the one in charge for handling the money that was supposedly mine to budget.So i felt like i was kinda by-passed by them.

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13 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Sat Feb 05, 2011 1:44 pm

leslie anne batara


Arresto Menor
can i file a kidnapping case against him and his family?

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14 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Tue Feb 08, 2011 3:19 pm

attyLLL


moderator
take it one step at a time. i do recommend that you prevent them from taking the child unless there is a clear visitation and support agreement and you are confident that they will bring back the child. good luck.


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15 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Tue Jul 09, 2013 8:47 pm

proudmomma


Arresto Menor
Hi, Attorney. I am planing to migrate and I have kids out of wedlock but are acknowledged by the biological father.they're using his name and been given allowances monthly. I want to know if I'd still have a Chance to get them abroad [and migrate] too,if the father does not sign the permission to travel documents? They are just 3 y/o. Pls. Enlighten me. Thank you

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16 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Tue Jul 09, 2013 9:05 pm

AWV


Reclusion Perpetua
This is difficult to get away with. But if you think you can make the father sign an authorisation for you to take the kids out of the country then do it! otherwise, if the father did not sign that authorisation, you will not be able to take the kids out of the country.

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17 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Tue Jul 09, 2013 9:12 pm

AWV


Reclusion Perpetua
Give me an email address on my PM so I can message you as my PM here does not send messages. I tried to message you who to go to and what is the best thing to do etc.

proudmomma wrote:Hi, Attorney. I am planing to migrate and I have kids out of wedlock but are acknowledged by the biological father.they're using his name and been given allowances monthly. I want to know if I'd still have a Chance to get them abroad [and migrate] too,if the father does not sign the permission to travel documents? They are just 3 y/o. Pls. Enlighten me. Thank you

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18 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Wed Jul 10, 2013 1:34 pm

attyLLL


moderator
it's up to the foreign government where you want to migrate to. some accept a mere affidavit, others require a court judgment


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19 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Wed Jul 10, 2013 1:43 pm

AWV


Reclusion Perpetua
AttyLLL, it is our end at Ninoy International Airport immigration who requires for the father's permission letter if the children are travelling abroad! either party if they intend to travel abroad they have to show a permission letter that the partner (if father's name is shown on the birth certificate) is allowing the child to travel with the partner.

The foreign government has no saying on this.

attyLLL wrote:it's up to the foreign government where you want to migrate to. some accept a mere affidavit, others require a court judgment

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20 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Wed Jul 10, 2013 1:58 pm

AWV


Reclusion Perpetua
http://www.philippineconsulate.com.au/dswd-travel-clearance-for-children.html



A DSWD Travel Clearance is a document issued by the Department of Social Welfare and Development (DSWD) to a Filipino child age below 18 years of age, regardless of civil status, leaving the Philippines alone or with someone other than his or her parents. Philippine law requires minor children who are traveling abroad without their parents to obtain a DSWD Travel Clearance, which is a safeguard against the trafficking of Filipino children.

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21 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Wed Jul 10, 2013 7:50 pm

proudmomma


Arresto Menor
the father of my kids is married prior to my pregnancy. if that's the case, would I get the sole custody of my kids? I am now having second thoughts about leaving the country and migrating in Australia. If I cannot bring them there, I am not sure I'd still want to go. Crying or Very sad 

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22 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Wed Jul 10, 2013 7:53 pm

AWV


Reclusion Perpetua
I told you to give me an email address and PM it here as my PM is not sending any messages but I can receive messages on my inbox. Don't know what's wrong or who is stopping me to message people privately.

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23 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Wed Jul 10, 2013 11:22 pm

attyLLL


moderator
the australian government requires you to present proof that you have sole custody.


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24 help for custody :) thanks po on Mon Jun 09, 2014 3:55 pm

Ma. Luiza Arguelles


Arresto Menor
06.09.2014Hi Atty,

Please help me, My bf has a daughter age 6 yrs old with his ex partner (they are not married and separated for long yrs, dahil na din sa ginawa ng girl), nung unang hiwalay nila nag ttry si bf na kausapin ang girl para sa bata, pero laging tinataboy sia ng babae at tinataguan, hanggang sa dumating ung arw na di na nia nakita ung bata, after 3 yrs, biglang sumulput ung girl begging for help  kasi nawalan sia ng bahay,trabaho at pera, pumayag si bf dun(tinagganp din ng parents ni bf ung girl kahit na madmai ginawa ung babae sa pamilya nila para sa bata) after then nag stay ang bata kay bf while the mother is just visiting,walang prob nung una, til dumating ang araw na nakislip over ako sa knila nun, then nag wala sia  as in nagawla sa bahay nila bf, wala daw respeto sa knya, (im confused) kasi alam ko wala naman kaming ginwang masama? pero pinagbigyan nlng namin sia, para manahimik, un pala gusto nia pati ung tatay kunin din at lumayo sila (after ng ginwa nia lahat) at iniwan si bf nun sa kawalan at hirap n hirap di makita anak nia ayaw na ni bf sa girl, ang concern nia lng tlga is his daughter, tapos ngaun umabot na sa dswd ung prob, after kasi magwala ni girl di na nakabalik sa bahay ulit nila bf kasi ang laki ng ginwa niang gulo nun, afterwards, may pumuntang brgy kina bf then asking na magusap sa dswd, dahil wala pang 7 ang bata kahit ayaw ng bata sumama sa nanay napilit pa din at walang nagwa kasi daw below 7 yrs old, dapat nasa nanay, wala ng nagawa ang bf so nag signing sila sa dswd na hiramin nalang ang bata once a week 8a,m - 8pm, nung una nahiram ung bata pero nung sumunod na, ayaw nanaman ibigay, ang dinadahilan nia ako daw, pirmahan ko daw sa brgy ung notice na wag daw ako didikit sa anak nia, at gusto nia makuha si bf at mabuo sila ulit knowing na ang gusto ni bf tlga is anak nalng ang pagusapan nila, hanggang ngaun hindi makuha ni bf ang bata unless dadalaw sia sa bahay ng magina tapos pag andun sia, pinararatangan sia ng kidnapping o magwawala kapag my bf refuse na di na sila pede magsama ulit para na lang sa bata ang concern nia.. naawa po kami sa bata kasi ginagamit po ng ina ung bata laban sa tatay, nakakawa kasi gusto nung bata sa tatay na tlga sumama, pero di po un consider ng dswd kasi daw po below 7 pa sabi pag 8yrs old na daw pede ayusin ulit, question ko po, binalikan po kasi namin ang dswd, pero sinabi lng samin na i korte na, ngaun confused ako kung pipirmahan ko ung sinsabi ng girl sa brgy para bigyan permiso ang bf na makita at mahiram ang anak, may kaso po ba sakin regarding dun?? help me naman po, di din namin alam ggwin ni bf kasi gusto nia din makasama anak nia pero nag iinarte po ung mother, ano pong pede kong gawin sa girl, kasi iniskandalo din nia ako sa bahay ko twice ako pinabrgay ng di ko alam ang dahilan, wala namn sa custody un right? thank you sir, i really appreciate your reply sir sobra maraming salamat po (til now wer stil dont know what to do.. lalo nasi bf



Last edited by Ma. Luiza Arguelles on Mon Jun 09, 2014 4:08 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : spelling)

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25 Re: child custody of an unmarried mother on Thu Feb 25, 2016 2:33 am

carlamargarette


Arresto Menor
Madang araw po. Isa po akong OFW, I have 10 years old son, wala pa po syang 1 year old ng iniwan ko sa mother ko. Hindi po ako kasal sa ama ng anak ko. Ina-acknowledge nya ang anak ko by signing the birth certificate at gamit po ng anak ko yung apilido nya. Matagal na rin po kaming hiwalay ng tatay ng anak ko at hanggang ngayon hindi maganda ang pag-uusap namin at ang pakitungo sa isa’t-isa pero may usapan kami na ok lang na dun sya tumira sa bahay namin habang nasa ibang bansa ako para sa bata pero pag mag-babakasyon ako aalis sya ng bahay namin bilang respeto. hanggang nalaman ko na after pala mag 1 year old ang anak ko eh kinsal na pala sya sa girl friend nyang OFW rin nalaman lang namin nung biglang nagparamdam sa mga kamag-anak ko ang asaawa nya. Pinaaalis ko na sya sa bahay namin dahil ayaw kong mag-karoon ng problema. Gusto ko po sanang makuha ang full custody sa anak ko pero maraming nagsasabi na pag-pinapili ng husgado ang anak ko sasama daw ang anak ko sa tatay nya dahil sya ang nakasama sa loob ng 10 taon at hindi malapit ang anak ko sakin. Pwede nya po ba kunin ang bata sa mother ko just in case dahil nandito ako abroad? Or if he will file for a custody while I’m here or I’m not able to attend the hearing, can he get the custody? Maraming salamat po.

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