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I am a wife of a philandering ship officer

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1 I am a wife of a philandering ship officer on Wed Mar 23, 2011 10:32 pm


Arresto Menor
Good evening, I am a wife of a ship officer. We have been married since 2004, no kids. He started committing adultery in 2007. He stayed more often with the girl than with me. In late 2008 the girl got pregnant and gave birth the following year. I have been trying keep our marriage intact despite what happened but I reached my limit and I went abroad that same year. A day after I left I learned that he let the girl live in our house, and up to this date they are still living there with their child while I, after coming back from abroad rented a small studio. He would visit me once in a while but most of the time he is with them. My church's teachings taught me to never let go of marriage, the only reason why I've been holding on for a long time.

I now realized that I have to fight for my right and am planning to go back to our house. I am also seriously contemplating on reporting him to his company and have his license revoked. I have gathered evidences (the manning agency allowed the girl to go onboard their ship as fiance while we were still legally married): girl's passport with stamps, letter from manning agency that she is travelling as fiance under my husband's support, picture of him, the girl and the child together, hospital bills and records where she was confined after having an ectopic pregnancy (2nd pregnancy)(it states my husband's name as contact person and as her fiance). I have not been elected as his allottee for 2 years now (the reason why I am resorting to free legal advice since I have no money to pay a lawyer), and i have evidences of the girl's outrageous expenditures when in fact she is jobless.

What are the chances that I will be favored when I report him to his company?

What rights can I demand as his legal wife when it comes to support considering we have no child?

Can I have his 1st Engineer license revoked?

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Prision Correccional
From your facts above and based on the evidences you have, I believe that you have a strong case for concubinage against your spouse and his mistress. I am not sure if having his license revoked and reporting him to his company will do you good since you are planning to get back to him. If that happens, you will both end up unemployed. As a wife, you are entitled to support and you have the right to live in your conjugal home. You can also file a complaint against him under the Violence against women and their children act. If you cannot afford a lawyer, go to the Fiscal's office they will prosecute the case for you. Good luck with trying to get your husband back.

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Arresto Menor
Thank you for your reply, l0st_StuDent. Him being unemployed is the least of my concerns now. I am only moving back to our house to sort of help him decide because he had always hinted that it's hard for him to leave the girl because of the child. If he still refused to let her go I will leave him for good but not without making him realize the impact of what he had done to my life. When I went abroad I started to rebuild my life, I was promoted after only 3 months. When he learned about this he told me to go back home and fix our marriage so I did. When I got back here in the Philippines nothing had changed, he'd only communicate with me when he wants to and I didn't receive any financial support.

Having his license revoked and reporting him to the company is what i think to be the best move as also advised by my friends who's husbands are of the same profession as him. I kept quiet for years living in agony because aside from my marital problems my sick mother has been an emotional burden to me too. He is aware of this but continued to make my life miserable. i am only too thankful that I did not go into deep depression after all the things he had done to me. I guess this is the best time to fight for my right and show him that I am no longer tolerating his acts.

I am currently located in QC, where exactly can I go for legal help? You're help is much appreciated.

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i would say that the best cases you can file against him are psychological violence under RA 9262 and concubinage. you can file a case for monetary damages against the mistress.

a complaint to revoke his license is filed at the board of examiners at the PRC.

if you cannot afford a lawyer, you can go to the pao, or legal aid office of the ibp or law school.

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